What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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