I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
