the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
time to smoke my breakfast
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
At least life still wants to fuck me.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
