"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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