I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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