I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
