youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
