what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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