Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
please come you make the beer taste better
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I smell like Dick and happiness
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
