party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i already hear my dad disowning me
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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