He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize