You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
