its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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