Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
