I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
