Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
This beer is not sobering me up at all
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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