found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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