hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize