three words: i give head
three words: not that well
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
