the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
what day is it and did you see me today?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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