Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just high enough for therapy.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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