Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
