just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
