do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
