Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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