It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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