I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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