Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
