I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
