What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize