Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
