Dual....:-)
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
