How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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