these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize