Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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