I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
