There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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