Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I supernannyed him into submission
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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