Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
