I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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