I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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