dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Holy shit dude........stairs
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
