I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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