Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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