Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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