maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Randomize
