also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
