I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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