Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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