i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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