This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
